Are you currently overweight but trying to become slim?
Or are you already slim, with the faith that the evidence for such will come in good time?
There’s a difference, a very big one.
When we set out on a journey to change in some way, we often pay little attention to how we identify with our self.
Whether we’re wanting to lose a few pounds or even a few stone; achieve a promotion at work; reverse a health condition or learn a new skill - we focus on the outcome.
We want to be a size 10; secure the management position; get our blood pressure down...all outcomes.
Is this the way to reach and keep our goals…or are we missing something?
When I speak to ladies who’ve lost weight and they still talk about how fat they are (even when they’re not any more) or they continue to wear baggy clothes and always dress in black (!) - it worries me.
I’m using the word ‘fat’ simply because they often do.
They’re still seeing themselves, fundamentally, as a fat person. As the person they were when they started their journey: unfit, out of condition, eating an unhealthy diet, no fitness, low energy and a fair number of aches and pains.
I hear them talk to each other…”You look great!” “Wow – look at you…you look amazing!” followed by responses such as “Oh, I’ve got a long way to go yet!” or “Oh, I’m still nowhere near as fit as you!” or “I’ll never be as slim as you though”.
Some will talk to me about how they feel and express how they can’t really see a difference, despite ‘before and after’ pics telling a very different story. As well as their partners, friends and everyone around the noticing huge changes in their appearance.
And it’s not just how they look that’s changed; their behaviours and experiences have too.
They’re now exercising almost daily, eating a really healthy diet, they have stamina, they have energy, they’re sleeping better and they’re pain free…but they forget this stuff because it’s become the new ‘norm’.
The reason I get worried when I see all this is due to something called cognitive dissonance. Essentially, it’s when your beliefs and thoughts about something don’t match your behaviour, your actions.
If you’re carrying out all of the behaviours that a slim person would engage in: exercising regularly, sleeping well, eating well….but you still believe deep down that you’re ‘fat’….eventually, your behaviours will start to follow suit and revert back to the very ones that made you overweight in the first place.
It’s why so many women (and men) spend their whole lives losing the same few pounds or even stones, just to regain them a few weeks/months down the line…again and again and again.
So how can you change this?
How can you start your journey, start to become slimmer and continue to get slimmer, eventually STAYING slim without losing everything like you’ve done before?
Change your identity.
You need to remove that cognitive dissonance and if a slim person is who you want to become, then a slim person is who you need to BE…in your mind, thoughts and beliefs…within the core of you.
Tell yourself you’re slim!! Every day, use words when you speak both to yourself and to others to remind yourself of your new identity.
When people compliment you on your results, thank them and take the opportunity to re-affirm to yourself that this is the new you.
“Thank you! I feel so much better – I’ve got more energy now and feel stronger every day!”
FEEL the new you…EXPRESS the new you…BE the new you.
If you find this hard at first, try asking yourself how a slim person would behave whenever you waiver with your thoughts, actions or beliefs.
When you wake in the morning, ask yourself:
“What would a slim person do today?” Copy them! They’d likely prioritise their exercise, diet and sleep daily…so do the same!
We are a direct consequence of our daily actions. When we believe every day, that we are already slim and that we do what slim people do daily, by default we become slim.
Wherever you are on your weight-loss journey now, please, never forget this.
If you’re just starting out, shift your gear right now, into ‘slim’ gear. You ARE a slim person already and from today you are going to act as one.
If you’re on your journey already, make sure you keep an eye on your identity…focus on the better version of yourself that you’re creating, not the previous one you’re leaving behind.
And if you are already where you want to be, really BE there. Take pride in your new body…dress in a way that makes you feel great, get your hair done, your nails manicured ;-).
You ARE a slim person so don’t hang onto your old self….be the YOU you now are.
Your new identity holds the key to you keeping your new figure forever, so connect with it and in every way possible, become the new you.